An elaborate cross between an English country house and an opulent bachelor flat is about the only way to describe the Crazy Bear hotel Beaconsfield.
Set within the oldest building in the village of Beaconsfield, a 15th-century coaching inn, this flamboyant hotel is just an hour from London, and combines achingly cool and, some might say, incredibly brave creative design comprised of bold animal prints, modern wrought ironwork and French boudoir chic.
Each of the ten bedrooms at the hotel is unique. We sampled Room Three, which came complete with crystal-studded settees, dark varnished floors, a separate wet room and the pièce de résistance — a huge freestanding copper bath in the centre of the bedroom next to the enormous bed. The touch-control mood lighting, hi-tech Bose speakers and full-size Molton Brown products are also a nice touch.
And the bar where Champagne is served on tap doesn't disappoint either. Manager and leading 'mixologist' Anthony Peart has a range of exclusive cocktails, including the Foaming Mojito, the Mad Hatter's Tea Party and new Smoking Cocktail (maple-wood smoke pumped into bacon-infused smoked vodka), which tastes surprisingly good.
As with everything about The Crazy Bear, the range of food on offer is diverse and the hotel has two restaurants. In the English restaurant, you can recline on crystal-studded banquettes surrounded by gold-leaf chequered walls in front of the open fire while enjoying traditional dishes such as confit belly of home-reared Gloucestershire Old Spot pork with Lyme Bay scallops, apple, chorizo and crispy potato. But I'd recommend trying out the Thai restaurant next door — which like their London branch serves up modern Thai food — an exquisite range of soups, curries and seafood prepared by chefs trained at The Royal Thai Palace. Dishes include crispy duck salad with mango, roasted cashews, pomegranate, spring onions, and cherry tomatoes, and steamed redsnapper with lemongrass, galangal, chillies, garlic, Kaffir lime leaves and coriander. We plumped for the flawless Thai green curry, succulent soft-shelled crab followed by wok-fried lobster and tiger prawns with black pepper and garlic. The fish tasted remarkably fresh and with the room's leather tables and velvet walls we felt enveloped in luxury, the perfect place for a birthday or anniversary. If you go in summer, opt for a spot of outdoor dining on the terrace next to the heated pool.
It's the tight attention to detail that makes Crazy Bear so different to the hundreds of other boutique hotels vying for attention across the country. The waiting staff work across all the restaurants and bars which gives the place a really personal touch. And don't forget to check out the signature features: the loos themselves have been the subject of many column inches, with floor-to-ceiling mirrored glass, they alone took 12 months to build and are an outstanding showpiece, while the six chandeliers in the bar came from Alain Delon's Paris apartment. Take a trip here for the weekend and they have food, nightlife and relaxation covered, oh and did I mention you could have a Thai massage in your room? All round bliss.
Crazy Bear, Old Beaconsfield, Buckinghamshire, HP9 1LX (+44 01494 673086; crazybeargroup.co.uk/beaconsfield). Room rates from £345 per night per room.
